Dear Sweetheart
I miss you and the girls so much
The war is still going and it’s pretty hairy
Yesterday Corporal Ted Stonch blew up beside me
One of our guys put a grenade in the pocket of his flak jacket
It was hit and he blew up
It was just suppose to be a joke
When I was dragging his body to the morgue
I noticed he had a nice wedding band
I switched it with mine
It was nicer than the one you gave me
No one will notice
I hope you don’t mind
I miss home and our evenings on the front porch
Yesterday we entered a village and killed everybody
We painted all our faces in a grotesque sort of way
Just to scare the crap outta everyone
We just went around killing indiscriminately
It was like Wednesday night mixed softball only with guns and a lot of dope
That’s what I thought anyway
Can’t wait to see the girls, and actually see them walk
I’m in charge of interrogating a prisoner tonight
We’ve figured out he is really just a simple farmer
But we’re interrogating him anyway
You have to pass the time and keep busy
Tonight I’m going to use the car battery
Remember to tell Mom and Dad, I love them
They should get on email
I have to go now..
We’re going for quick reconnaissance and hope to blow up a few mosques and shrines and fire random rockets into civilian refugee camps
It’s our Thursday night tradition
Kind of like dinner at your mom’s only with guns and a lot of dope
Love you
Kiss the babies tonight for me when you tuck them in
I have a present for you,
I shouldn’t tell you what it is
But it’s made of human fingers and it hangs around your neck
Hopefully it won’t get confiscated before I get home
Hugs and kisses by the millions
Donny……